Sergio Garcia Wins The Masters, Sad!

The most unlikeable player to ever put a tee in the ground won the greatest tournament on Earth Sunday.

Sergio Garcia, who’s whining is only superseded by his juvenile sportsmanship, won the 2017 Masters on a birdie on the first playoff hole with Justin Rose.

After a clutch birdie on 16, Rose had a one shot lead coming to the penultimate hole, but a poor approach shot left him in the front bunker where he was unable to get up-and-down. Garcia and Rose both missed short birdie putts on 18 to force the playoff.

Rose was ultimately undone in by a poor drive on the first playoff hole. The Englishman pushed his drive into the trees and a poor punch-out left him behind the eight ball as Garcia hit his approach to 10 feet and clinched the title with the birdie conversion.

The win is Garcia’s first major in 73 tries.


– As everyone beats the “he deserves it” storyline to death, let me be the first to give the largest eye-roll in human history.

– Garcia’s win simply caps off the largest gag reflex of a week in the sporting world that began with UNC winning the National Title on Monday.

– With Sergio and USC-alum Stewart Hagestad, who clinched low amateur, in Butler Cabin, I hope the AGNC thoroughly disinfected that area.

– The pivotal hole was obviously 13. As Sergio was beginning his choking reflex, he was able to scramble from an unplayable lie to save a par, while Rose three-putted for par. That hole changed the momentum and feel of the entire tournament.

– The fact that Sergio will be apart of The Masters for the next 50 years is a gag-inducing thought.

– Most of the the final round was characterized by the chasers’ failure to make a run. Fowler, Spieth, Hoffman, Scott, and Moore all failed to make a serious charge and most were out of contention at the turn.

– The significant runs came from Belgium’s Thomas Pieters, South Africa’s Charl Schwartzel, and Matt Kuchar who’s round was highlighted by a hole-in-one on the 16th.

– Having a duel between two Europeans down the stretch did not have the pull for me. It was like rooting for the lesser of two evils.

– The fact that Sergio was paired with Rose is one of the main reasons he won. They are comfortable playing together as fellow Euros and the fact that no third-parties made a serious run allowed the final six holes to feel like match play – a format where Sergio thrives.

– If I had to hear how apropos it would be if Sergio won on Seve’s 60th birthday one more time, I was gonna have an aneurism.

– Sergio’s whining is nothing ground-breaking, but since heaps of praise will now be thrown upon him, I thought it would be a good idea to revisit a few instances that illustrates what a surly prick he is….

– That enough? I have way more in the docket, but cannot find the treasured footage from the 2002 U.S. Open where Sergio acted like a child to the crowd.

– Again, the second biggest headline after Sunday was the failure of Spieth or Fowler to make any run. Spieth blew up on the first nine, while was able to steady the ship and was -5 after 10, but back-to-back bogeys on 11 and 12 doomed his chances.

– Spieth’s record at Augusta and in crunch time at majors in unquestioned and he gets somewhat of pass for this, but Fowler’s performance on the second nine raised questions of if he have the mental makeup to get it done on Sunday in major.

– Fowler’s 2014 major season was one of the greatest of all-time. He was the first player to ever finish in the top-5 in every major, but despite those great efforts, the 2014 PGA was the closest he came to winning any of those tournaments and still finished two back for Rory.

– Thomas Pieters is a beast and will win The Masters in the next five years. The Masters rookie got off to a hot start as he was five-under through 10 on Thursday and charged into contention on Sunday. He has the perfect game for Augusta as he is long, straight, and has a solid short game, which will serve him well in future trips to The Masters.

– Adam Scott has struggled with the putter throughout his career, but this week exemplified the trouble he has on the greens. If he had just putted average, Scott would have won the tournament, instead the Aussie burned edged all week, especially Sunday and had to settle for a terrific tee-to-green game that went unrewarded.

Shot of the Week:

Many will say Sergio’s approach on 15 or his winning putt was the shot of the tournament, but because I am a sore loser and a bit of a xenophobe, I am giving the award to Matt Kuchar. Kuchar’s hole-in-one on 16 kicked off the drama on Sunday. I think he gave a high-five to every patron surrounding the 16th tee.

Otter Room Picks:

Looked pretty good through 70 holes. Justin Rose obviously finished in second place, while Spieth concluded the tournament at -1 which was good for T-11. Dark horse Daniel Berger finished T-27 at +3.

Stay tuned to The Otter Room this week for a complete preview of the RBC Heritage and hopefully we are able to withstand the vomit-inducing fawning Sergio receives this week. T’s and P’s everybody- it’s gonna be tough, but we can get through it.

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